Yeah, I was a total loser.
Now I recent every frikkin moment of it. I want it all to go away and leave me to wonder what is going to happen this time.
So I need another way to 'be'. I am still wagging my jolly little tail - sort of. And I have a couple of days till AF is supposed to arrive and I can get sweet release from the EL. I am eating everything that isn't nailed down so I shall be gaining some weight this week but I have already given myself a pass.
I need to find the calm rhythm of the fast paced life I work in. I need to find the flow. Confidence should help. I am, deep down, totally under confident about,well, everything. So I panic and start cranking the adrenalin whenever I get a call from a client. Deep breath. All is calm and cool. Whatever it is I can do it or tell 'em I can't!
My boss is away for 3 weeks which really helps.
By my calculations I should start my AF pretty soon. My last CD1 was August 24th. In fact, lutial day 14 is tomorrow I think. Ohhh, I could be close, really close to not feeling like an alien. And to being on cd1 of my first DE cycle. Scratch that. CD1 of my ONLY DE cycle.
Keep your good thoughts coming and post a comment. I could do with all the friends in the world right about now ;-)