You know that big job I was interviewing for ? They asked for references, which in my book is a good thing. I hope.
Or do I?
I'm still struggling with the idea of not being around the kids as much. They are so wonderful and make my anxiety just dissolves (and all sense of hearing due to the screaming). They are learning so much, doing so much, changing so much and so much damn fun!
This job would be an amazing opportunity for me. Get me into an area that I admire and love and I'd get to do all sorts of fun stuff.
My kids would miss me. Wouldn't they? I would miss them for sure.
I hate having this dilemma. Why can't I have a great job and a home life? DH, in his wise way, said 'just try it. if you don't like it or the kids don't like it.. we'll try something or somewhere else" big words from a life long NY'er.
Whatever happens I keep telling myself to be grateful for the choices. Grateful for the love I feel for my kids. Grateful for the job opportunities and working opportunities. A modern mommy moment for sure.