Background for those that don't already know:
We have been trying to have a baby for..ages. Married to a creative chap and we live in NYC. We have tried 4 IUI's, 2IVF's and we are now on our first Donor Egg cycle. For those that don't know what that is ... we get a donated gamete and inseminate it with DH's sperm. Then, with the 65% chance of success, we pray for a healthy implantation, gestation and birth. I will be the babies biological mother but not their genetic inspiration.
I go to Cornel.l for treatment and so far I have been pregnant once for a nano-second. I did have a natural pregnancy but I miscarried at 11 weeks.
I have also just lost 30 pounds in order to help the DE process. Since I have started L.upron (Evil Lupron EL) I am hungry ALL the time!
Meanwhile .... my worry about being pregnant. I POAS this am and got a BFN. YIPEEEEEEE. never so happy to see that bright pink line hanging out all solo. So my tail is wagging I am barking less and have even treated myself to a detox at Bliss Spa in Soho. It is the same cost at a regular massage and I get to be scrubbed, rubbed and wrapped for 90 mins. You know why I am doing this? Because I want to shed the 1.6 pounds my weigh in told me I had gained last week. OBSESSED! Well, that and the fact that it will totally freakin rock!!
I am also meeting colleagues that I really enjoy hanging out with this afternoon and we are doing an off site - going to the movies!! It is totally boiling outside (or hotter than a badgers arse as we say where I come from ) so movies and gym are all I plan to do today.
I am highly irritated and have a damn headache - I hate EL - but at least it feels like AF is on her way. I would say 4 days. Every day is one step closer to trying again. It seems weird that this is our last try. Our last hurrah.