I realized how much I've matured over this past year. I was in a cab coming back to my apartment. Once we got to my street I asked the cabbie to pull over. He didn't respond so I assumed he hadn't heard me. I repeated myself. He rounded on me and he was a big fella
"ok if I pull over? Huh? huh?OK if I pull over"
A year or two ago I would have been terrified.
I smiled. Pathetic. Pathetic bully that has no idea what I can do. I can survive through two pregnancy terminating within me, I can take pills, pain and massive depression. I can handle my privacy being invaded, my private parts being examined, judged day after day and failing 'the test' time after time. You think you can intimidate me!
"You didn't respond to my first comment so I repeated it"
I slowly counted out the money (sans tip) and handed it through the window. He grabbed at it and started counting. Once again he snapped around and started in on me. I had a dollar held out so he bumped into. He tried to intimidate me by staring at me but I just sat there ... waiting.
Thanks, he mumbled and turned around.
It is true that through adversity we can rise, grow and discover more of ourselves. All good qualities to be a mom.