I spoke to my boss about maternity leave. I stated that I would like to take 3 months off and since I haven't had a pay rise or bonus for .... YEARS ... I would like to stay on full pay. I broke down the time like this - one month will be my vacation, and 6 weeks will be covered by disability since I will probably have a C section so I am asking him for 2 extra weeks of paid coverage.
He agreed as long as I was on call whenever he needed me and that I came into work for the 3rd month on a part time basis. Part time my ass. I know he wants me in the year end strategy session which means I will be sitting in 4 hour meetings at least 3 days a week. I will still be recovering from the damn C Section.
Ah well, at least I have a job I guess. Two months with my babies then back to work. He cited someone that came back after two weeks. Big fucking deal. I am having twins asshole. And I am legally allowed 6 weeks recovery time. 6+4 = 10 - two and half months in my book.
I guess I shall have to swallow that bitter pill and be thankful I am getting two months. Of course, there is problem with this scenario. I will have to be off work BEFORE I give birth. That should be interesting! I shall get a doctors note and then...I think I will have to save some money and go out on unpaid leave.
I will be very surprised if I am still working at my job this time next year. There are rumblings of cut backs and what not. I should start lining up plan b's, 'justincase's. Ahh stress.
you may want to double check the disability...I know that many state 6 weeks for vaginal birth and 8 for c-section!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you're getting your ducks in a row. 4, 6 or 8 weeks, I know you'll treasure every minute of time with those darlings.
ReplyDeleteHang on there. 6 weeks for a vaginal birth, 8 weeks for c-section. That's standard. And any time BEFORE the babies are born that you're out is disability - which has zero to do with the 8 weeks of disability AFTER the babies are born. And, by law (FMLA), you're entitled to 12 weeks (yes, unpaid) of family leave in which they have to secure your job.
ReplyDeleteWomen usually take the brunt of the infertility stigma but the male can also have issues relating to their age as it relates to the ability conceive. A study of over 12000 couples done a couple years ago concluded the age of the male was a contributing factor the number if miscarriages and issues conceiving at all.
ReplyDeleteSperm quantity and quality was examined as part of the In-vitro Fertilization process. Miscarriages were more prevalent when the male was of 40 years of age, even if the female was not. Researchers felt the data supported the findings that the age of the male as a significant factor in the viability of the fetus. These researchers also recommended that in case where the male was over 40, couples having fertility issues should elect to have the sperm injected directly in the egg to help the chances for success.
Although no technique is guaranteed, studies like this one gives credence to the idea that couples over 40 who have issues trying to conceive, may not entirely be an issue with the female. Men over 40 can be a contributing factor that can delay or even prevent a successful pregnancy.
http://gravitygarden.com/trying-to-have-a-baby/getting-pregnant-after-40.html
Ew, yeah. That's not so nice. I'm not familiar with NY state law but there are specific federal FMLA guidelines depending on the number of employees in your company. I'm a bit surprised your boss isn't treading more lightly here.....
ReplyDeleteYour boss is a jerk. I bet he takes trips to europe each year that are longer than that. Check with your HR department to find out what your rights are. Or, when the time comes, get your doc to keep you out longer on disability. Just read my posts and you'll see, new mommyhood is no easy road! And with twins...you will really need extra time. Pregnancy discrimination laws are fiercely protected in most states.
ReplyDeleteHi EB -- I had to go back to work about 6/7 weeks after Liam was born (I had a c-section, he was breech). He was born towards the end of June and I went back towards the beginning of August. We needed the money, and the way disability worked for me it was 6 weeks only, and the first 2 weeks were an unpaid eligibility period or something, and then the next 4 weeks were only at 60% pay. And I didn't want to draw down all my leave because Will was really sick and I was worried I'd need time for that. So, you know, it sucked, but I have to say it sucks more in retrospect than it did at the time. Now I look at little 6/7 week old babies and I think: my God, how did I leave my child when he was so small. But, I worked only about 50% time and no travel in August, and they up to about 80% starting in September, and then back to full-time in January. Anyway, I'm not recommending it, but it can be done, although with twins, I don't know what that would be like. It's good to get it all figured out ahead of time, that's for sure. I haven't been on the internet much but I think of you and those amazing little lemons often. With love,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
Your boss sucks! I wish you could catch him saying something really anti maternity leave - that two weeks thing is definitely heading in that direction and sue his rotten motherfucking ass.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to agree to be on call when you are on disability - that is ridiculous. Would he do that if you had any other kind of disability? No!
I'm so mad! I really think that you should document everything he said and talk to a lawyer. There are sone serious rights ( if not benefits) that cone with federal law on maternity leave and I think he has already transgressed.
Sorry you feel you have to cowtow to him. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.!!!