I am trying to write this post with a fat cat lodged beneath my chin. Remember last summer when my cat Moxie got very sick. Well, she aint sick now - just enormous. And cuddly. She is upside down with her little paws in the air waiting for me to scratch her belly!
Last night we went to the hospital 'baby essentials' class. We got our very own little dolls to practice holding, changing and feeding. OK. I learnt quite a bit. How to pick up a new born in the three holds - swaddle, football and the upside down football. I did find the breast feeding instructions useful - nipple to nose, tease till mouth wide open and then bring the baby onto the boob. We were introduced to the platex bottle drop-in feeder system - which does look good so check it out if you are interested in breast and bottle feeding. Other common sense stuff - don't use any soap on a new born baby, don't put your kid under a running faucet, use rectal thermometers only (!) and don't use plush bumpers in the cribs coz they are dangerous.
However, the nurse running the class just irritated the living crap out of me. She kept saying "Oh I am so mean". Well, lady, you weren't mean, you were grandiose but hey, who's playing psychologist. Every class we go to the leader seems to think we have joined the marines of parenting or something. I sat next to a women from Argentina who was in hysterics thru most of the class!! You could say the non American contingent got a poor attention grade - especially when she got to the bit about not traveling overseas with your kids!
I guess I'm an optimist but it seems to me that there are billions of people on the planet and that means billions of babies that survived without momma going to 12 hours of baby classes etc! The nurse was adamant that even with the night nurse I get up to do the night feed. Well, I'm not so sure. If I pump enough during the day doesn't that mean the nurse can feed the kids and isn't that the point of hiring her in the first place!!! My kids, my rules.
Oh then she started on the c-section. I should go to lamaze classes, consider a "natural' birth. Gosh, I got to 6 months preggers with twins and never considered these options. What's that? You run a class and its only $300! Shocker.
It may be the hormones or it may be denial but the closer I get to actually holding and having my kids the less inclined I am to buy into the whole shock and awe approach. I expect it to be smelly, loud, frustrating as well as wonderful, amazing and awesome. As an adventurer that sounds like fun to me!!
So my new mantra: my kids, my rules.