What now? Oh yes, I have spinal compression again. It's the Lup 'i hate EB lets sock it to her' ron and I have had it before so no panic. Lots yoga and slow walking. It's a great excuse not to do any weights at the gym which means I have to do all the weird Pilate's and stretchy yoga that is on offer there. Did I mentioned I am built like an English rugby player?? Me doing yoga is positively hilarious. Like the hippo from a Disney cartoon.
So here I am. Half way through my mock and I have started to worry. What do I know about the donor - do we have a donor! I haven't had any blood tests for E2 etc . I am seeing her Dr J on Sat so I shall write a list of questions to go through with her. I am not really talking to DH about how I feel or side effects etc. I think he would prefer to just let it all disappear for a few weeks. Don't blame him. Neither one of us are talking about 'when we are pregnant in January', in fact we haven't even gone as far as 'if this happens' coz I think we both expect it not to. All we do talk about is adoption - the worry of the kids rejecting us when they get old enough to suss us out, the biological family being nuts and causing nothing but mayhem in our lives and the big one, the one we haven't spoken about for any real time, how we feel about not having biological children.
We go to Vermont the first week in December for the Friends in Adoption workshop (thanks Kate!!) so maybe that will be the time to have those discussion.
And one last thing; thanks for all the lovely messages welcoming me home. I must say, you guys make a whole world of difference in my life. The support, comradeship and empathy.
I laughed out loud at your yoga description, but suspect it is not quite as ridiculous as you make it sound.
ReplyDeleteSorry you aren't feeling great; take care and take it slow -- the last thing you want is to hurt yourself!
Do tell lots about the adoption workshop after you go. Sorry about the back.
ReplyDeleteYou sound in great spirits - I'm so glad to hear you're doing well. The adoption workshop is a great distraction (and Plan B) while you travel along this IF path. That's our next step also. Keep up the positive attitude!
ReplyDeleteGlad you're seeing Dr J on Saturday to get some answers. So sorry about your back - is this something acupuncture can help? I totally understand not wanting to discuss side effects and symptoms...Mr. Hatter doesn't acknowledge my 2WW barely at all anymore, out of self-preservation from having his heart broken so many times. Vermont in December sounds lovely! Can't wait to hear all about it!
ReplyDeleteSory about your back damn it, and laughed at your Yoga description and rugby hippodom, too fun and funny and familiar!
ReplyDeleteAnd you, bring questions to Dr J, ask for the info you need, and let yourself feel this is real when you are ready. I wish you ALL the best with this cycle, and good luck in Vermont. I hope the place and people are as cool as they seem. That would make me happy.
Take care EB, and gosh I hope your back feels better soon.
XO
kate
Take care of yourself and go easy, will ya? Gosh, that lup/ron can mess up your bones (as you know) and you don't want a permanent injury.
ReplyDeleteWell, let the elephant sit in the room for a while. There will be time to talk. The trip to Vermont sounds lovely - both with respect to looking into adoption and because Vt is just a pretty place, and the drive there is nice too. Have a good appt on Saturday.