Well its been a tough couple of days. my post partum depression seems to be hovering on the edges. Its a strange feeling, somewhat familiar since I had a serious depression many, many years ago. It scares me and covers my day in grey cloud of anxiety.
Physically things have had a step back. I developed a hematoma (sp?) and yesterday it made itself known. So I spent the evening at the ER getting prodded and poked and packed. If you are unfamiliar with the C-section joys, as you heal there can be a pooling of liquid (in my case blood) that needs to be dealt with (like dry rot in a house). We didn't get home till after 1am. Thank all that is that we have a night nurse. I now have to have a nurse visit every day to treat the wound.
OK enough moaning. I am tired and weepy but who isn't after birth. We have tons of help. We have amazing friends that rally when we ask them. And best of all, my kids are fine. They are growing and fun and cuddly. They know who their mum is and were upset when I wasn't there to feed them last night. Our regular night nurse starts tonight and she is motherhood personified. And our wonderful nanny hasn't even started yet and she wants to visits to make sure I am OK and meet the kids.
So a minor set back and many things to be grateful for. I'll have a good cry and then hustle to get my little lad his breakfast otherwise he'll yell at me!!!