Wednesday, October 12, 2011

holding on

Everyone thinks I'm great and no-one is hiring! There is one job open to me but the asking price is way lower that we need but if I can get them up... you never know.

I'm losing confidence in my skills and my battle with depression. An ugly black cloud is holding me down and making it hard to move or think.  I don't think I've eaten in 12 hours which is really not like me! I know it all sounds cliche but there isn't really another way of describing it.

I saw a headhunter today who depressed the living crap out of me. I think I met her years ago and there was a reason I didn't get to know her!!

Oh I'm crying again. Stop feeling so sorry for yourself women.

If you're out there, drop me a line - just say hi or shut up or cheer up you depressing old cow - I'd love to hear from you.


11 comments:

  1. I am sorry you are in such a rough place. As tough as it is, you have to keep working your network and putting it out there that you are looking for a new job.

    Try not to let the turkeys get you down.

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  2. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Thinking of you, hoping for good things to come your way so you can get back to 'real life' and don't have to waste your time on this job-hunting stuff. Hang in there.

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  3. I m so sorry this happened. You have not said what industry you work in... I'm sending good thoughts and luck your way. Thinking of you!

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  4. I have had times in my life where I truly believed everything was bad and would never get better. To shake myself back to reality in the deep depression, antidepressants helped me. Most of the time when I get those feelings I try to name all things good in my life that I should be thankful for and watch the news to remember there is always someone else with a lot worse troubles. I understand your depression, as job equals security and security rocks. Just try and take it day to day and not try to run through every horrible scenario that could happen. One day at a time and life will even that bumpy road out for you soon.

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  5. I am sending you big< mama-style hugs, a cup of sweet, hot tea, and a giant bubble bath. And I am crossing my fingers that the most amazing position is out there waiting for you and it will magically appear before you are finished with your current one. And then, my wish is that, a year from now, you will be so glad this happened.
    Lots of Love,
    Maddy

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  6. Sending much love EB -- you are strong, you will get through, good things will come to you.
    Elizabeth

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  7. We're here for you! You are a STRONG person and you will get through this. I know you don't understand now but God has a plan for you. Just have faith.

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  8. Oh, come ON, EB, you're not the one to be put down by changing a job... You are way tougher than that, honey. I know that it sucks, and that maybe the timing could have been different, and that it is the last thing youwanted to do. BUT, you will get through it. As long as you are healthy, and the kids and husband are healthy, you will get through it.
    I went through all this shite once. It seemed to be the end of the world. It wasn't, obviously. Truth be told, I had no children. But it was no rosier. You will find something, even if not as well paid in the beginning. And you will be fine.
    Keep calm and carry on.:-)
    I am not being patronising, I just want to help yo see yourself as you truly are.

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  9. Breathe. You have two amazing kids - lucky you! You are going to make it, you are going to find a position, you will look back on this and remember how strong you were to get through it. It's really not been that long since they cut you loose and it may take some time to figure out where to go from here. It is very common for panic to set in initially when the rug gets pulled out from under you. I went through that too when I was laid off. You need to relax so that you can think clearly and locate all available resources. Steep a pot of the best tea you have, climb into the most comfortable chair and tell yourself a hundred times "it will be okay." If you can, take a day OFF from even thinking about it. It will do wonders for you, and the next day you will probably have ideas about contacts you wouldn't have thought of otherwise. Sending you hugs (and wishing I could send you a position).

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  10. Thinking of you today EB and sending love!
    Elizabeth

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  11. Oh hon, I'm sorry you are all depressed. Sometimes things just don't go your way - and of course you know that counting your blessings is great, but still! Can you go to a concert or even just put on a favorite cd - sometimes distraction works with adults too! And you have sooo much on your plate, don't be down on yourself for feeling down once in a while! Thinking of you...

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