I started my job yesterday.
wait, that can't be right. its been at least three weeks hasn't it?
nope. yesterday.
I was a complete wreck yesterday! Crying at night, throwing up (yes, oh yes) and wanting to run away. I felt vulnerable and frightened. I felt like I had made the biggest mistake of my life and there was no way I could do the job.
Finally, today, my second day I met folks who are industry veterans but new to the company and they closed my door and described a very similar reaction to the company. Its not that its bad. Its just that it is huge and everything ... EVERYTHING is in flux.
However.
For the first time in my life I have an amazing boss. I think I will learn lots from her. I have lovely colleagues and with the exception of one guy, I have a great division.
The best thing tho...
We all leave at 6pm.
I am home by 6.30 and have tons of time with the kids. I love coming home to them even when they are total snot balls of cold!! How much snot can that little nose produce guys???? And does it always have to come out and directly onto my silk shirts?
So there we are. A new chapter opens up just like that. An out of home working mum of twins. I am remarkably proud of that!
wait, that can't be right. its been at least three weeks hasn't it?
nope. yesterday.
I was a complete wreck yesterday! Crying at night, throwing up (yes, oh yes) and wanting to run away. I felt vulnerable and frightened. I felt like I had made the biggest mistake of my life and there was no way I could do the job.
Finally, today, my second day I met folks who are industry veterans but new to the company and they closed my door and described a very similar reaction to the company. Its not that its bad. Its just that it is huge and everything ... EVERYTHING is in flux.
However.
For the first time in my life I have an amazing boss. I think I will learn lots from her. I have lovely colleagues and with the exception of one guy, I have a great division.
The best thing tho...
We all leave at 6pm.
I am home by 6.30 and have tons of time with the kids. I love coming home to them even when they are total snot balls of cold!! How much snot can that little nose produce guys???? And does it always have to come out and directly onto my silk shirts?
So there we are. A new chapter opens up just like that. An out of home working mum of twins. I am remarkably proud of that!
Wonderful! I fight anxiety and would have been just like you as I started a new job (in the process of looking for a new one now). I'm so glad that things look like they are working out and you can have some kind of work/home balance!! I can't wait to hear how it all goes :)
ReplyDeleteYay!!! Sounds like it was a brutal beginning but you are on the right track! Keep up the good work! You are awesome!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy that things are falling into place for you. So glad that the initial stress and shock wore off and you can begin to enjoy both roles. And it's so wonderful that you get to spend time with your amazing kiddos. You should be proud.
ReplyDeleteKathy
So glad!
ReplyDeleteYes, you SHOULD be proud. That's a lot going on! I hope the job turns out to be really awesome and worth the long wait. And perhaps your blouse is washable silk???? (let's hope!)
ReplyDelete