Our first Halloween

Whoopee. I love this. I get to dress up the kids, hand out crappy candy and cover the outside of the apartment with spiderweb, pumpkins and skeletons. Best of all i get to scare the crap out of the neighbours dog with our scream box. he he he he serves him right for waking my damn kids up all the time.

Odd physical things

TMI Alert - I have bright yellow vaginal discharge (11 weeks pp). Its a little disconcerting. Can anyone shed light upon this gruesomeness?

Meds up. Mood up

Yep, I upped the meds. As much as I hate the idea of my mood being chemically produced I was reminded by my psychopharmocologist that my mood is a symptom of a chemical deficiency which is bad for me and the kids. And after two days of upping the meds - mood is much better (less irritable, less angry, less weepy, less tired).

We have smiling - the kids and therefore me. Mimi has the best damn smile ever, she just spreads that smile right across her chops and her eyes light up. And Pip, he grins! I swear ... grins!! They are both so lovely and so totally different. The sleeping routine is a nightly chore however last night Pip slept from 12 to 5 and Mimi from 12 to 6. Not bad for 11 weeks- ish. We are out of cash and therefore out of time with the sleep nurse. I hope she can work her magic before she leaves or else I am working 12 hours at the office and then spending every night up with the kids. I know millions of women have done and good on 'em. It will kill me!!
Please prey for long sleeps. Thanks

Baby blues

I think I got 'em again. I have started back at work and that doesn't help. Its not the kids - I love' em to pieces. Our savings are close to gone which sends me into fits of panic. Things between DH and I are strained. Its the usual - I don't feel supported or that he is doing enough and he feels totally pressured. Sound familiar?

I am also gaining weight not losing it even tho I am pumping like a bloody oil rig!

Oh I really need to shake this funk. Maybe I should go back up on my meds but is that really the answer?

Not twins

I read lots of blogs about twins. OK a few. Everyone talks about how their twins are always together, playing together, being together, afraid when they are apart etc.
My twins are not like that. Pip cries like a deranged person if Mimi gets in his space. What's with that? She is quite a bit bigger than he is and she did spend most of the time in-ute kicking his head but what happens if they can't stand each other. We only have one space for them so they will be sharing a room for quite some time. Rather than mirror each other (which I read on blogs is really common for twins) my guys are polar opposites. One hates the cold, the other hates the heat. One likes to sleep in the am the other hates it. One likes to nap in the evening the other hates that. Needless to say, I am knackered trying to keep up. Even with our schedule this is one tiring job.

Please tell me stories of how twins grow to like each other!! And how it gets easier. I'll take any morsel you got.

Poopapaloozi

Since i did the night shift last night DH got up at 7am so i could grab a few hours. When i got up it looked like the house had been hit by a hurricane!! ! I was only asleep for 3 hours. Boxes of food on the floor, baby bottles everywhere, kids undressed and best of all a giant puddle of poo in the kids room!!!!.

Ode to Nel.

If anyone asked me what one thing has made these first 9 weeks wonderful I would say without hesitation - Nellie. Nel is the night nanny. It is a total luxury to be able to afford any kind of help. Luckily we saved throughout the pregnancy to afford Nel. When our contract came to a close a few weeks back she suggested we pay her less so she could stay on. I swear - she suggested a lower night rate and no agency involvement. So I cashed some stuff in and we have her for a while longer.

It's not just the sleep. 6 hrs is a godsend I know. It's not just her reassurance and knowledge of twin development. Its her humanity as a whole. She makes the kids giggle and laugh. She is never in a bad or sullen mood even when she's been walking the floors with a cranky kid all night. She always says 'Good Morning mommie" in a bright tone when I stagger out in the am. She even told me to go back to bed the other day when I was coming down with a cold and worked for free as a baby sitter for a couple more hours.

She works all night and today she is on the cancer walk, she volunteers through her church and she is going to a class to set an example for her son. .

I am so amazingly lucky to have her around to make these past 9 weeks what they were. Tonight she takes her first night off. Hope she has a blast!!

If anyone is having twins and is interested in hiring Nel let me know and I'll pass on her contacts. She's worked all over the world and is perfect for the first three months. She can do night work or 24 hour.

There ... that's my Ode to Nel