These kids can keep the damn things! For now, we have beaten a hasty retreat on the passifiers - the binky's are in.
Breast feeding Question. Pumpers - how much did you get and how often did you pump?
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Passie War
I made a huge mistake. I let the kids have passies. OK, I encouraged the kids to use pacifiers. Damn you passie devil!!! Here's the problem. Sleep training is on going. Kids are put to bed drowsy but awake. Binky's are in and all is well with the world. Eye lid's droop, arms and legs fall open. Then, boom, passie falls out and the screaming starts.
In the day I use them to help them nap.
Bad mum.
Today is day 1 of the Passie War. I decided this morning that they shall be gone from this home. I lasted two about ten minutes. I am so crap. You win this battle Passie Poophead.
I asked A. (nanny) and she agreed - no need for pacifiers. They are only acceptable if the kid has colic, not GERD. Her belief is that when kids of this age cry it's communication. They are trying to tell you something so let them 'speak' - its the only way they know how right now. Work it out and respond. Don't stuff a pacifier into their mouths as if what they have to say isn't important.
I agreed and looked with fear at the wobbly lip of Pip, as he revved up for an all out ... communication.
In the day I use them to help them nap.
Bad mum.
Today is day 1 of the Passie War. I decided this morning that they shall be gone from this home. I lasted two about ten minutes. I am so crap. You win this battle Passie Poophead.
I asked A. (nanny) and she agreed - no need for pacifiers. They are only acceptable if the kid has colic, not GERD. Her belief is that when kids of this age cry it's communication. They are trying to tell you something so let them 'speak' - its the only way they know how right now. Work it out and respond. Don't stuff a pacifier into their mouths as if what they have to say isn't important.
I agreed and looked with fear at the wobbly lip of Pip, as he revved up for an all out ... communication.
Monday, October 11, 2010
calm after the storm
Well that was unpleasant! Little miss (known by her nickname 'mimi' at home) had a bug or something. She screamed for about 12 hours straight and threw up every time she ate. We were all in tears by 9pm. I knew boasting about how well we were doing was going to jump up and bite me in the ass.
I proudly ran through the checklist and she did not have a temperature, she was having wet diapers and she was eating. At about 11am Pip started. Pip throws up anyway, well, sicks up. Sometimes a little and sometimes it seems to be the entire feeding. With two of them it was hopeless, I gave up on the burp cloth early in the day. At one point my T-shirt was so wet through I had the chills!
Anyhow, we stuck to the schedule as much as we could. Mimi would not be put down or cuddled by anyone but me, even when I was trying to change my soaking wet shirt. She did sleep a little but not as much as she would normally. Poor little thing whimpered most of the day.
They both calmed down after their baths and Mimi ate a big last feed and slept 6 hours (with a diaper change at 3am). Once awake she consumed ...wait for it.... 6.5 fl oz. She is 8 weeks old. We all stood around the empty bottle just staring at it, then her, then the bottle again. She ate again a few hours later as if to say "what? no biggie"
Needless to say, I am waiting for 'the' diaper. You know the one.
I proudly ran through the checklist and she did not have a temperature, she was having wet diapers and she was eating. At about 11am Pip started. Pip throws up anyway, well, sicks up. Sometimes a little and sometimes it seems to be the entire feeding. With two of them it was hopeless, I gave up on the burp cloth early in the day. At one point my T-shirt was so wet through I had the chills!
Anyhow, we stuck to the schedule as much as we could. Mimi would not be put down or cuddled by anyone but me, even when I was trying to change my soaking wet shirt. She did sleep a little but not as much as she would normally. Poor little thing whimpered most of the day.
They both calmed down after their baths and Mimi ate a big last feed and slept 6 hours (with a diaper change at 3am). Once awake she consumed ...wait for it.... 6.5 fl oz. She is 8 weeks old. We all stood around the empty bottle just staring at it, then her, then the bottle again. She ate again a few hours later as if to say "what? no biggie"
Needless to say, I am waiting for 'the' diaper. You know the one.
Saturday, October 9, 2010
sleep training
Kara's Mom asked for our sleep training process.
I read tons of books on sleep training. There are so many extreme theories that are, in my eyes, insanely stressful for everyone concerned. My brother did the Ferber method. NEVER. I took quite a bit from Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins.
So, here is our mash up theory ...
We fed them every three hours from the day they were born and we keep a log of how much they eat, what they are like, what their diapers were like (yes, we change every time we feed). For the first 6 weeks this was all we did. As they increased their feeding amount we pushed the interval to four hours if the kids were OK with it (i.e. they were quietly asleep)
When we hit six weeks the interim time between feeds is not just nap.
6am - 7am bath/ dress from 6 - 7am
7- 9am Light nap (i.e. in a bouncy chair or play pen) or play.
9-10am Feed
10 am Activity - outside if possible. At this point looking at tree's is an activity.
12 pm Feed
12 - 4 pm Deep nap (somewhere quiet and not moving (ie not running around in the stroller).
4 - 6 pm Activity. Usually I take them out in the stroller).
6 pm - Bath (or splash), bottle and book (usually the newspaper coz this is THE ONLY TIME I GET TO READ IT!!)
7.30pm Bed.
Now this is where it gets interesting
They stay in their cribs but if they cry we go to them (we take it in turns). We tell stories or read from the paper, sing a song or just put a hand on them and they go back to sleep. For about 5 mins! Sometimes they sleep for an hour, or one of them does, while the other cries.We will pick them up if they are going crazy and set them down when they show drowsy signs. We will bring them out of the bedroom if it is near 9.30pm but not before.
10pm - Big feed and bed.
From now on, if they wake up they are changed/fed and put back to bed. No fussing, eye contact etc. Since we have one baby with GERD he needs more attention at night than the other. He may sleep for up to 4 hours but that is a red letter night! Baby girl on the other hand has one feed and change about 2am and then she is down till 6am.
Here is the secret. Day napping. If they do not sleep well enough in the day we are screwed. The naps are really important. I don't care where they sleep but its calm where ever they are. Usually one of them needs a cuddle but its calm and relaxed wherever we are.
At 8 weeks we're all doing OK I think!!
I read tons of books on sleep training. There are so many extreme theories that are, in my eyes, insanely stressful for everyone concerned. My brother did the Ferber method. NEVER. I took quite a bit from Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins.
So, here is our mash up theory ...
We fed them every three hours from the day they were born and we keep a log of how much they eat, what they are like, what their diapers were like (yes, we change every time we feed). For the first 6 weeks this was all we did. As they increased their feeding amount we pushed the interval to four hours if the kids were OK with it (i.e. they were quietly asleep)
When we hit six weeks the interim time between feeds is not just nap.
6am - 7am bath/ dress from 6 - 7am
7- 9am Light nap (i.e. in a bouncy chair or play pen) or play.
9-10am Feed
10 am Activity - outside if possible. At this point looking at tree's is an activity.
12 pm Feed
12 - 4 pm Deep nap (somewhere quiet and not moving (ie not running around in the stroller).
4 - 6 pm Activity. Usually I take them out in the stroller).
6 pm - Bath (or splash), bottle and book (usually the newspaper coz this is THE ONLY TIME I GET TO READ IT!!)
7.30pm Bed.
Now this is where it gets interesting
They stay in their cribs but if they cry we go to them (we take it in turns). We tell stories or read from the paper, sing a song or just put a hand on them and they go back to sleep. For about 5 mins! Sometimes they sleep for an hour, or one of them does, while the other cries.We will pick them up if they are going crazy and set them down when they show drowsy signs. We will bring them out of the bedroom if it is near 9.30pm but not before.
10pm - Big feed and bed.
From now on, if they wake up they are changed/fed and put back to bed. No fussing, eye contact etc. Since we have one baby with GERD he needs more attention at night than the other. He may sleep for up to 4 hours but that is a red letter night! Baby girl on the other hand has one feed and change about 2am and then she is down till 6am.
Here is the secret. Day napping. If they do not sleep well enough in the day we are screwed. The naps are really important. I don't care where they sleep but its calm where ever they are. Usually one of them needs a cuddle but its calm and relaxed wherever we are.
At 8 weeks we're all doing OK I think!!
Friday, October 8, 2010
Sleeping question
we are in the process of sleep training (ohhhh so much fun). Little boy is a good sleeper but his hands are freezing. I know he doesn't like being cold and I think this is part of the reason he wakes up. Hats don't stay on his head and his hands are cold.
We use a sleep sack but I can't find one with gloves.
Any ideas??
We use a sleep sack but I can't find one with gloves.
Any ideas??
Monday, October 4, 2010
Back in the saddle...
Can you believe I am writing this from work. I took off two months and here I am again. I feel like its too soon and then again, soon enough. I have guilt at leaving my kids but relieved to be back in the land where I know what to do most of the time. I miss them and it feels so good to be away for a bit. I think I am may be going insane! I blame it on the lack of cookies. Nearly every morning fro the past 7 weeks I have got the kids down for a nap, poured myself another cup of (decaf) coffee and munched through at least 3 or 4 chocolate cookies while watching the WE.st Wing reruns. HEAVEN.
However
I am still 20 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight as I found at when returned to weight watchers this weekend. 20 pounds. Ah well, it was so totally worth it!! I have upped the amount of breast feeding/pumping, included a longer walk, asked for permission to go back to the gym, cut down the amount of 'fatty' foods (not cut out, not yet) and I am aiming for 1 pound loss this week. Yes, you read it right... 1 pound. I do not want to put any pressure on myself. My first goal is 1 pound, then 5, 10 and finally 20. Once I am back to pre-pregnancy weight I will celebrate by signing up for the tri-boro bike ride and start training. I have a total of 90 pounds to lose till my 'insurance' weight. As you see, it's going to be a long haul but I will not be the fat mum when these guys start school.
So, back at work, back at WW and back to eating healthy.
However
I am still 20 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight as I found at when returned to weight watchers this weekend. 20 pounds. Ah well, it was so totally worth it!! I have upped the amount of breast feeding/pumping, included a longer walk, asked for permission to go back to the gym, cut down the amount of 'fatty' foods (not cut out, not yet) and I am aiming for 1 pound loss this week. Yes, you read it right... 1 pound. I do not want to put any pressure on myself. My first goal is 1 pound, then 5, 10 and finally 20. Once I am back to pre-pregnancy weight I will celebrate by signing up for the tri-boro bike ride and start training. I have a total of 90 pounds to lose till my 'insurance' weight. As you see, it's going to be a long haul but I will not be the fat mum when these guys start school.
So, back at work, back at WW and back to eating healthy.
Friday, October 1, 2010
D&G
Sprogblogger wrote a wonderful post about what its like being the mum in the donor gamete situation. We decided to tell the kids first and go through a slow process of acceptance/normalisation. This is the approach we were counselled through at CCRM.
It isn't too far from the process of adoption realisation.
It is a hard process. I have kept this all important info from my parents and family. I feel like I am lying to to them. My mum keeps asking who they look like. I keep saying they both look like my DH's side of the family. Now, remember, they are mostly 'gone' so it's not like we are all going to be sitting around the kitchen table together.
Who do they look like? Not me. They have the same hand movements as their dad and one has his ears, the other his chin etc. When we go out with them a few people say they look like me. Either they are blind or just being nice.
But here's the thing. I'm a carbon copy of my mother in looks. We are similar in mannerisms but not behavioral development. More importantly I am 'like' my mum in important ways - my integrity, my dedication to hard work, my mothering essence (love, love, love).
My kids have the chance to not inherit my depressions, my fat ass, my dyslexia, my dreadful legs. They have a chance to live without an addictive mind - one that could have made me an alcoholic or drug addict or anorexic or compulsive spender. They will have my ability to stick with it, to work very hard to channel one's energies towards a positive outcome; like persisting through all the odds so that I can look to my left to see my two sleeping children. My daughter. My son. Mine.
It isn't too far from the process of adoption realisation.
It is a hard process. I have kept this all important info from my parents and family. I feel like I am lying to to them. My mum keeps asking who they look like. I keep saying they both look like my DH's side of the family. Now, remember, they are mostly 'gone' so it's not like we are all going to be sitting around the kitchen table together.
Who do they look like? Not me. They have the same hand movements as their dad and one has his ears, the other his chin etc. When we go out with them a few people say they look like me. Either they are blind or just being nice.
But here's the thing. I'm a carbon copy of my mother in looks. We are similar in mannerisms but not behavioral development. More importantly I am 'like' my mum in important ways - my integrity, my dedication to hard work, my mothering essence (love, love, love).
My kids have the chance to not inherit my depressions, my fat ass, my dyslexia, my dreadful legs. They have a chance to live without an addictive mind - one that could have made me an alcoholic or drug addict or anorexic or compulsive spender. They will have my ability to stick with it, to work very hard to channel one's energies towards a positive outcome; like persisting through all the odds so that I can look to my left to see my two sleeping children. My daughter. My son. Mine.
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