Twins and marriage

Every book ever written on marriage with twins says the same thing - your marriage will be tested. I examined our life together and tried to prepare for this. And yet. I am failing at either finding a balance between my expectations of what needs to get done or I have unrealistic expectations of my partner.

My level of frustration is getting higher with each moment of action not taken, responsibility shrugged or jobs ignored. I feel less and less attracted to a man that acts like a boy. I do not want this resentment in my life or marriage. I have seen what it can do and I wish with all my heart not to stumble into that bleak future.

He speaks about his emotions and expresses love for myself and the kids. I need to see him act on those intentions. I need to see him physically doing things in service to our life, our home and our family.

What can I do? What has worked for you? I need your thoughts on this one.