Saturday, August 31, 2013

Weigh In and catch up

Wow, its been a crazy week.

I went to Canada to meet some new work colleagues even tho I don't start my new full time position for quite some time.  It was two days and I was really nervous but they were great. They are smart,  funny and friendly people. Very competitive but I can handle that :)

There was lots of food. I ate carefully and drank tons of water. Down 1.8 pounds.

The kids missed me and I didn't make time to Skype with them (I only had 30 mins free time) but on  Friday I took Mimi to her first ballet class. Just Mimi and mummy. I sat outside the studio and watched as my little one ran around in tiny ballet slippers and a tutu. She and I loved being on our own (this is the first time). When we got home Pip was asked when his mummy time was but his class doesn't start for a while. I gave him all sorts of love and cuddles to make up for it.  It's so much fun having twins but the alone time is so special. An so easy!

Looking forward to alone time with Pip although I bet he asks for Mimi the moment he realizes she isn't coming with us!

Oh and it was my birthday yesterday.

Yup, quite the week.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Give away update

For those that were interested in the car sear give aways when I took the car seat and stroller bottom into the shipping place it ends up being over $120 due to bulk. The whole thing is less than that new.

Sorry about that guys. If you are still interested please let me know and we can email each other. 

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Saturday weigh in (drum roll please)

I lost weight :) -4.8 pounds which for someone over 40 is not to shabby.

I am so pleased with myself.  I tracked and exercised. Enjoyed food and slept great. PHEW.

the regular leader is back. She is on TV quite a bit and that means we get 'WW tourists'. This week was a couple from Texas who were pretty shocked by all the F-bombs flying around. Sorry guys. They had a blast though which was cool.

The meeting I go to is pretty tight. Long termers and lifers. They asked what had happened to me and before I could think I said "I took a job that  I allowed to take over my life in a very bad way. Basically I had a breakdown. One day, my boss confronted me again and I fought back. I quit. I told her to get a package together coz I had her on tape and she did".

The room erupted. People were hugging me and shaking my hand. They had said that the last time they saw me they were worried for my health and sanity and that they were proud of me. From a tiny moment of vulnerability and a little bit of shame I feel lifted on the shoulders of those wonderful people. I have been lift out of my shame and embarrassment to a strong healthy place.

What a frikkin amazing WW meeting!!

Friday, August 23, 2013

Ballet pas de deux weeks

I love watching ballet. So when I had a little girl that also loves to prat around with her arms in the air I thought "hell, yes"

I waited till a great deal came on-line and bingo! 10 ballet classes with the S.wiss American Ballet school. It was supposed to start two weeks ago.  For two weeks we Mimi's mop of brush hair back (with magic gel) and don pink tights (no shine) white leotard (spaghetti strap only) little ballet slippers and a sweet white band for her head and trot off to the other side of town.

Each week the snotty teacher cancels.

They have the nerve to mandate a strict dress code and then not have the frikkin class! WTF. Next Friday better be something out of this world.

I called the teacher and said "we are at the school for the 10am class but there's no-one here?"
"Oh darlin' you 'ave to confirrrrrrrrm et you did not"
"I see, so paying for the class isn't the same as actually confirming the class. Good to know. Let me confirm for next week now  so we don't score a triple on the return shall I?"
"oh you must confirrrrrrrrm ze day before"
"no, I must confirm now, coz I took the day off work to be here and it costs me a great deal of money and my kid has been disappointed for the second week an a row so, madam, aller en classe la semaine prochaine, d'acord!'

There was another little girl that came for class - not ballet'd up (ha, tourist) but she only spoke French so my kids yelled at her,  y'know, they being American and all.

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Bug bite

Mimi has an couple of bites on her leg. They are large round and hard. Today they started weeping. I went to the chemist and she gave me some stuff.

Amazing how something so little can worry me so much. I love being a parent, even tho the weight of the worry is unbearable at a moments notice.

On the weight loss front - I ran today. Ran like the clappers. Furthest ever in shortest time. Was it fun - hell no. Am I proud. Hell YEAH.

Monday, August 19, 2013

Day three and I am still doin' it.

It's like being in rehab getting back on the healthy eating kick. I am constantly thinking I could 'sneak' to 'my' bakery (might as well be since i fund the joint) or eat early or just eat. Oh man, just a little carb and sugar, c'mon man.

I was pretty sick this weekend which I think was a sugar with drawl. OK might be making the metaphor  stretch a little thin. badaboom! here all week, eat the veal.

I do feel better and I am sleeping better even after a couple of days even tho the series end for True Blood was weird and left me going 'huh?'. It seems to have developed into something else. Not sure what. And Eric. Just ... Eric.

Today is the first full day that I have to myself. Sort of. Well, not really but it should be so that counts, right?  Dh and I were talking about sneaking away for a few days now that I have the full time gig but it turns out he can't get any time of work. However, we did promise to work out a way to get some time away from home.  I have always wanted to go to Bermuda.  For someone from England and my generation it's like James Bond glam.  I've heard it really expensive but maybe for our wedding anniversary? That would be super romantic. It's two hours away. I could be on a moped by lunchtime. Oh let a girl dream can't ya!

Kids were very tired this weekend and I got sick (thanks Pip) so we just kind a hung out. Jigsaw puzzles and boiled eggs. We went to 'our' bakery for brunch and all the tourists were gawking and my guys tucking into their eggs and soldiers. I was so NY twin mum about the whole. 'What? They're three now. They can drive, speak mandarin and work the stock exchange'. At least I was till Pip flicked the yolk at me coz 'it's a'. Must watch my language.

What mini breaks have you taken and how did you decide on them?

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Year 3 promises

Kids turned three and we had the best party.  However, I saw the photo's and I was so embarrassed.

When I returned to WW this weekend it became clear that I have just really f'd up. All the weight back on. I have 100 pounds to lose again. Ohhhhhhhhh. When I couldn't eat in the first trimester of the kids pregnancy I lost more weight and that meant I went down by 42 pounds. I cannot believe I have to start this journey again.

By my birthday I will have tracked everyday (August 30th)
By Thanksgiving I will no longer be in my damn FAT PANTS
By Christmas we will have a family photo where I will be proud of myself again.

Because I will not be the fat unhappy mum when my kids start preK next September.

I will be the healthy happy mum.

Damn it!!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

When it rains it a freakin' monsoon

Here is my week so far.

Mon:  amazing full time job offer.
Mon: Pip goes down with really high temperature and hasn't slept in two days
Tue: kids 3rd birthday party - 3!!!!!!!
Tue: amazing counter offer by my freelance client
Wed: directing a reading on Friday without a producer (read: chaos) rehearsals start tonight

I am so frazzled it's not funny anymore.

Job: great company, no travel and they came after me (read: exciting and flattering)
Kids party: amazing and wonderful. Really funny entertainer, home made everything from sandwiches to cake and I did most of it (mum of year award to me). Wonder nanny came in and said that all the guests and moms had enjoyed themselves and the kids were all pooped. Pip and I missed it all since he wanted to get away from the noise. Awwww. We are having another little party this weekend for them so he can get some birthday mojo back.

It's been crazy fun but really stressful. I am all tied up in knots and ... I haven't slept.  Sleeping is key to avoiding a chemical mishap in my brain. I can feel the black clouds framing my mind and need to clear them away.  I should be really excited about this new job and when I take a moment to think about it I am but right now, I'm fighting the blues.

I'm also terribly conflicted about the new job. I have a good little business going and agreements right through to the end of 2014. However, whilst I would earn lots of money I am finding it a little boring, which surprised me. So I have opted to go for less money and more diversity in the full time job. I also get flexible hours and huge amounts of vacation time which makes me very happy. At least it will if I can catch up on some sleep. 

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Car Seat and Stoller GIVEAWAY!!!

  We have to get bigger seats for our guys and I thought if someone out there wants to take our old ones that would be cool. We've used a total of about 15 times coz we live in NYC so we don't drive!  No accidents, no dropping etc. We used them to go to UK and they were amazing - easy to fit on place, small enough for european backseats.

If you would like them (they also have the baby insert thing) then please let me know. At the moment I'm hoping someone will want to pick them up! Any new new york mamma's out there in need of a terrific lightweight, parent approved seat and stroller?? If you aren't in NYC and really need a car seat then just drop me a line.

Gently used CAR SEAT GIVEAWAY + Stroller base (foldable) with stroller bag x2 

Combi Coccoro Convertible Car Seat - Licorice
The lightweight and compact Coccoro convertible car seat is compatible with smaller vehicles. A 5-point harness with padding, Tru-Safe Buckle, forward and rear-facing lock-offs, energy absorbing EPS foam and 4 position height adjustments make for a safe and comfortable environment for your child. An adjustable infant insert can be accommodate infants starting at 3 lb. and position your child at the recommended 45 degree angle. The single-pull adjustable harness system, shoulder belt retainers and washable seat cushion add convenience.

    Compact design accommodates smaller fuel efficient vehicles
    Allows up to 3 seats across the rear seat of most vehicles
    5-point harness with chest clip
    Mini-connectors with red/green indicator
    Rear-facing tether with Tether Connector Strap
    One pull harness adjustment
    Tru-Safe Buckle
    Shoulder belt retainers for placing child in seat easier
    Rear-facing and Forward-facing Lock-Offs
    Tru-Safe Side Impact Protection (EPS)
    4 position height adjustments
    Belt Lock-Offs to provide a tight installation
    Removable Mommy's Lap Insert to provide comfort for smaller children
    Lightweight and easy to handle
    Fast and easy vehicle installation
Dimensions: 17 in (l) x 15.50 in (w) x 28.25 in (h)
Product Weight: 11.75 lb
Rear-facing weight capacity: 3-33 lb
Forward-facing weight capacity: 1 year and 20-40 lb
Height allowance: 40 in

Thursday, August 8, 2013

second opinion

Thanks Brenda, I did go and get another Dr's pov. He agreed that after losing weight (50 pounds minimum) then reduce 'what's left' so that as little weight as possible is pulling on my back. He suggested lap band but I really want to try and do this by myself.

He also suggested a breast reduction. My girls!!!!

In the meantime I go to physical therapy twice a week. Workout every other day. Yoga every other day. Pilates or giro something every other day.

Yeah, lets start small shall we!!

Good lord.

He said that going abroad is "a stupid idea" and that after losing weight he will write the recommendation for reduction based on the insurance friendly rules.

So there we are. Operation (mmn need a name - any idea? ) is ON!

Thanks again guys

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Fog is lifting...

I had a sinus infection and an ear infection. The doctor asked me why I had lived with the pain for so long. I thought about it.

My back. Stay with me. My back got damaged when I was pregnant and will always be bad. My level of pain is compounded by our seriously crap mattress which we are addressing, slowly.

My back hurts all the time, so much so that sinus pain and ear pain, which I recognised but ignored, isn't all that.

So I went back to the list of things I'm supposed to be doing.

  • Certain exercises and RICE on joints after exercise.
  • New mattress
  • No high heels over 4' (hahahahah)
  • Stretch & pilates every day (hahahahahahahahahahahaa) 

Then there is the lower abdomen surgery. I was advised to have the fat removed on my stomach, back and thighs - you know the twin hangover as we call it.

So, out of 'why the hell not' I started googling options. Abroad. Out of state. Can we afford it - yeah I guess.

What would you do?

Friday, August 2, 2013

Help please

I am so tired and foggy headed all the time. What is with that? I'm mid cycle so it isn't PMS.  I am literally struggling to keep my eyes open.

I tend to put everything down to having kids and being old but this is really starting to mess with my mo jo! I have a ton of work to do and all I want is to curl up in bed and sleep.

I am wiped all day and then can't sleep at night. Takes hours to fall asleep. I am off rhythm for sure.

But what to do?

Any ideas?